Yesterday was one of the heaviest, most energetically brutal days I have experienced. It made me feel physically nauseous at times as well as dizzy and winded. By the time early evening came, I was a mess. This deep, heavy energy was consuming me and I finally lashed out by breaking something I value. That lead me to this deep feeling of regret and a huge well of thoughts of self-loathing. (stick with me – this improves!)
Before going to bed, I let myself just feel these energies and have these thoughts. I reached a point where I knew I could not go on one more second having this experience. My initial choice was to simply say I give up. But then like Neo in Matrix, that inner Eternal Light, in all of it’s quiet and NEVER ENDING Force pushed up and out of me and guided me to “surrender and KEEP GOING”.
So I did. I went to bed feeling more solid and empowered. Still in a lot of distress, but my narrative and thus energy had shifted.
Then I had an interesting dream. I saw HRC’s spouse (am not saying their names or spelling them out) and he was trying to give me a gift to give to my daughter. I was in some large warehouse – as an employee. At first the gift seemed innocent but I immediately knew better. I looked at it and commanded to see the Truth of what it really was – and yep – it morphed into something twisted, sick and demented. “No thank you,” I announced, went and got my girl and left.
Next scene we’re home, my girl outside playing and I was out front. I “felt” them coming – again. Shit, I thought. They’re just not going away. I felt no fear though. The feeling was something like a rain shower was passing over or some mosquitos – annoying pains but that’s about it. So I told my girl to listen to me now and get inside immediately. She listened. I went inside and quickly but calmly shut the windows, locked the doors and as I did I thought I should have just hopped in the car and drove away. The dream ended.
So several things to say now. 1) The power and influence of all that is resisting Love is weakening – quickly. But just like the deep state, they still have ammo and they’re pulling out their last bag of tricks before they are forced to surrender or be consumed by the energies of Love (Truth, Freedom, Accountability/Justice). Yes I know the Cats say pick – justice or source. To me it’s one in the same. So I will just leave that at that. Love sees ALL and when ALL is seen ALL is owned. If that isn’t Justice I don’t know what is.
2) Just as I have felt and been saying for almost 2 years now – all that is not Love (doesn’t that sound better than dark?) – all that is not love in action – will continue to resist until the last moment. Still feeling that. Likely why I keep surrendering – that energy is strong and front and center now – when faced with something I wish to resist – hide from. It is as it is and I am as I am.
When I awoke this morning, I saw a message on facebook on what has been transpiring and will share that in another message. I also had a text message from brother Rick who said Clair came through and said something huge was lifted last night and now things are moving swiftly (I would add “again”).
NO KIDDING!
Tuning into this – feeling into that in my personal portal (the shower) – I felt what was lifted ~ the program of self loathing.
All who made the choice to hijack this realm run on self-loathing. That’s what happens – that is the result – when you choose to power over someone. You essentially hold the experience of hating thyself. And while it’s really an illusion in that this is a temporary experience, it still does damage to self and others. Free will has allowed for this.
Freedom however does not. Total misalignment of energies.
They inserted that program of self loathing into each of us. And given, for me that is, it is one of my biggest issues if not the core issue – the one emotion/experience that comes up when I go deep within my pain – I feel I have been helping to transmute that energy which means I have been not only carrying my own experience but also feeling it from them and the collective. Yeah, ok, my brain thinks – my mind resisting this one – but it is the first feel I had about it. Or what could be more of a possibility is because it is the program that was lifted from the matrix grid, I felt that resistance all yesterday and had such a powerful experience in diving into my own self loathing last night and into this morning.
I WOULD NOT EVER LOATHE MYSELF WITH FULL AWARENESS.
I WOULD NOT DO THAT TO MYSELF.
I told myself these words – as I looked at myself in the mirror – weeping – ok, bawling – (it is 4:44 as i type these words). I smiled at myself – reminding myself of Who I Am. Just – ME.
About 30 minutes later I headed to the store. As I got out of the car, I heard “some of your family has inserted themselves. here in xxxxx…yes here in xxxxx (as when i first heard that i thought here in xxxxx? this place is so insignificant!). you will see some of them in the store.”
WTFig? I thought. I laughed it off but it felt like a very real communication.
Well wow. Once inside the store I began seeing people – all women interestingly enough – smiling at me. But this smile was different. It felt eternal. It felt like the connection we all REALLY have. Authentic greeting. It felt like it will at Home and once this thing called The Event enters. It was – amazing. Beautiful. And it happened several times. I noticed that the clerk’s – who have been really subdued and low in energy the past few weeks – were up and enthusiastic and smiling in a brighter way.
That’s it – that’s the word – BRIGHT. I noticed a BRIGHTNESS in all I greeted. In whom greeted ME. Usually I am the one to smile first – not today.
Wow did this leave me feeling light. REALLY LIGHT. Floatie almost. I kept feeling “Home”.
As we arrived at this home, I reflected on the experience and at the beauty of it. As I did I was guided to look up at the skies and saw the most beautiful rainbow I had seen. The colors – there were more than the usual 7. There was like a second row of just magenta pink/purple on the bottom. I ran inside, grabbed my camera and took some pictures – but it began fading so quickly. Below is what I was able to capture.
Happy Rainbow Days. I hope you will all be able to tune in and feel a shift today. Others I have spoken with who have been feeling that UGH I CANNOT TAKE THIS ANYMORE the past 1-3 weeks have also notice things feeling “better” today.
That is all….for now.
Love,
Victoria

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Same with me, yesterday. Heavy brutal energy or feelings. And dizziness. Also, this neighbor put a gargoyle with shiny eyes facing my balcony. What the hell?!! What is up with that?