I don’t know – really – who all comes here and reads my material. I can see who subscribes – who comments – who reaches out to me personally through email and other social media platforms. But other than that – I don’t know if I have lurkers who only seek to get “info” on me – the local woo woo one.
Whatever on that…..
Going back to about mid June, things got really f’ing hard for me – for this family. Nothing tragic – just ongoing pokes and challenges – one would get dealt with then another popped up making processing fully impossible. Today – dealing with ANYTHING – I just can’t do it. One new little “thing” and I close up inside like a vault.
I do the intending up and out my @$$ whenever I can think of it. I reach out. I ask. I pray (I do A LOT of that now).
I am surrounded by people with too many degrees and too much money and therefore pretty damn sure they think we’re the stupid ones. I honestly don’t feel like being the smiling neighbor anymore. We are the classic “victims” of this system – which if you don’t feed it well – or engage in in the way it dictates – you get tossed out. In my 30 years of wanting something different I have YET to find just one person in my physical proximity (other than my spouse) who is actually interested and WILLING and able to bust out and create totally new. And I am weary. I am just f’ing weary of thinking I will ever create that for myself. Heck, at this point in my life, my body – and especially my brain – are too tired – traumatized – and compromised to do that in any way successfully on my own. I’d need to be carried and treated like a 5 year old at this point. I struggle to enter passwords some moments.
But this is all happening so those I (and some of you) are surrounded by can “see”.
Today – I just can’t. I am part of the tribe now saying SHOW US. I NEED to SEE now. Truly SEE. Energetically – my ability to carry this hope – this knowing – at this moment today – I simply don’t have it in me.
So may others can carry it for me for awhile.
That’s all I got.
Love,
V.
It’s time to sit go within sis. You bring us good info, much appreciated/valued. Thing is it’s very important to focus on heaven.. nothings gonna change in this matrix shit hole. So cry, lay around, rest. Talk to heaven best you can. Pitch a fit if you need to.
I love you sis!!!
I hear you. I was nearly homeless(no exaggeration) back in 2009-2011–I moved 10 times in two years…and things are only marginally better today. I have an abiding faith in God. I also believe that an alliance rose up to deal with a certain assassination in 1963. We are in a transitional phase that is historic–no doubt about it. What I do to stay centered is to imagine We are living in a post Roman Empire collapse, and I am looking at creating alternatives to a dying paradigm. We will survive this. After all, we didn’t get the euthanasia drug. I appreciate your analysis and efforts to inform much. Blessings.