As someone who has spent nearly 30 years, off and on, on healing my mind and body, I have come to see how complex and tedious it is to truly heal. At least here. Earlier today I was engaged in a conversation with someone who was talking about the power of the mind – how no one makes us feel something emotionally – only if we allow that experience.
I’ve never really aligned with that concept – and when I step back and reflect – I don’t see the point of it. Not that our minds aren’t powerful – they are of course – but that in this imperfect world with so many things to cause us distress and to throw us off balance – such a statement misses out on – dismisses – all of the nuances here.
The example being used was the soldier rescuing children – they feel that trauma to the body upon seeing and rescuing – and yet they are trained – diligently – to endure that in order TO complete the mission. However, like many other veterans of war, once the mission is complete, have that soldier pay a visit to their body, check in with their nervous system and there will likely be stored emotion/trauma there. We see this frequently. That soldier is trained like a computer – but they still have the same nervous system as every other human.
As one who has attempted to heal from trauma, I am finally seeing certain things are necessary to do so. One, an environment of safety. The body/nervous system has to trust those around them to effectively and fully heal. Also needed is someone skilled at trauma and how it is experienced in the body. Mind/Body connection is huge – and what I have learned is the body plays a far bigger role in healing. You can’t just focus on the mind – on the cognitive. The body has to be included because it is in the body where the energies of the trauma reside. The brain holds the memory. But the body is what holds those stored emotions. I recently saw something happen to me. For a couple of months or so I was engaged in writing down those things I not only wanted to create but those things I wanted to feel. I could feel this energy building up and my mind was getting more excited each day. However, something happened and I hit a wall. My body basically said “hey wait up!”
It’s also important to not rush the process of healing. The body moves more slowly than the mind. So you may tell yourself things like “I am healed”, etc. – but the body is going to say “uh, ok, we can get there, together, but please don’t look away from what I am feeling right now – don’t ignore me – help me by working with me.”
Meet the body where it is. Just like ANY form of real connecting, magic happens, healing happens, when all forms of life meet up at the same place. I am learning to hold space for my body – just like I hold space for my child or for a friend who is struggling. Telling them positive intentions only goes so far. Holding space allows them to feel and be how they need to be. And it also creates an environment of safety – feeling safe – which as I said above – is imperative for healing.
Are we humans with a soul or a soul in a human vessel? (or spirit or over-soul and the plethora of labels we use to define us) I ask: Does it really matter? When it comes to healing, no. It’s ALL important. Every part of us matters and is involved in healing.
Animals in the wild have a far more basic system. They lack the frontal cortex. Therefore, when the trauma happens, they don’t stop to question or figure out. They just “do”. It’s like their bodies are designed to naturally process the trauma. Once the process is complete, they go about their experience. Not that they forget the event – but that the sensations experienced as a result of the trauma are processed out. We humans are more complex.
I sigh. I wish I had known this 30 years ago. Even 20. I’ve spent years in talk therapy – talking about those events – then replacing the original thought with something new. This. has. not. worked.
I’m also wondering something to add in to all of this: the importance of having others involved in sending the necessary pure energies/thoughts to help heal. I remember watching a video put out by Gregg Braden. Japanese Doctors were healing patient’s tumors with their intentions. You could see the tumors shrinking quickly. I thought about that today and realized this was likely effective – and quickly – because the doctors don’t hold the same thoughts about the person as the person him/herself. What I am saying is that we all have a plethora of thoughts, obviously, and many of those are not supportive to healing. Most of us have at least one negative thought about ourselves. Common ones are I’m not worthy, I don’t deserve, I am incapable, I can’t, etc. But do I hold those thoughts about you? No. I may judge someone/others at times, but I don’t hold onto those thoughts. It’s as though the way these bodies are designed, they are designed so that negative thoughts we hold about ourselves stick. (I have my own perspective on that one after reflecting on it for awhile – the hijackers – those who turned off/changed our original DNA Code – knew exactly what they were doing.) So – it is easier to hold healing thoughts for another because I/we don’t have to wade through the years or decades of negatively held thoughts like we do when we attempt to heal ourselves.
That is why no one heals in a bubble. We need others to help. Not because we are weak – but because of how it is here and how we are in it.
And because maybe we really do need each other far more than our ego and mind sometimes allow us to think.
That’s all for now.
Love,
V.
